I've always appreciated April Fool's Day ever since I first looked up its origin in the Big Book of Answers. Yes, kids, there was a world before Google. April 1st became a day to mock those who refused to buy new calendars. These cheapskates continued to celebrate New Year's in April. Idiots. Everyone knows it's January 1st/sometime between January and February depending on the year. Duh.
In light of the occasion, I decided to share some of my finest moments at failed attempts to be on the winning end of practical jokes. Don't worry, there was no emotional scarring involved, but if that makes it funnier for you, you can pretend there was.
In no particular order:
1. That time in elementary school I tried to saran wrap a toilet seat. Hey, it worked, in a way. Those poor fools couldn't lift the lid, and they had to fumble with saran wrap. So ha, kind of.
2. This morning at school when I announced a bogus date to the entire school for morning announcements. No one listens to announcements! Burn!
3. Once, I planned the perfect practical joke, completely foolproof. I taped over a cassette and left it on my desk, hoping a teacher in our small Christian school would confiscate it. They had a problem with students bringing in rock tapes at the time. Wow. this story is already funnier than I thought it would be. Anyway, the bait was set.
The day went by, and the tape remained ignored. Finally, I took desperate measures. I handed the tape to some friends and told them to pretend to rat me out. They obliged, and I did my best to pretend to be mad. Of course, keeping with my role of the kid in big trouble, I stayed out of the way after that.
Some teachers fumbled with a sound system, got it plugged in, and played the tape. At the very beginning, before 30 minutes of dead air, they could distinctly hear the words "Gotcha!"
It was successful and quite fun to watch. Or so I've been told. I missed the whole thing.
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